Behind Enemy Lines with a Goat

My clients in extremes.

Witnessing heroic adult children refuse advice to go no contact from narcissistic parents who weaponize incompetence has taught me boundaries is a subtle skill.  Hard to see without an experienced eye.

How did wounded adult children who were scapegoated by their  narcissistic parents survive while protecting their elderly parents?  They used distance.  Close enough to observe and protect but not get stung on the cheek.

This is going to be a belabored metaphor.

From the movie Behind Enemy Lines.  Starring Gene Hackman and Owen Wilson:

Admiral Reigart: (Hackman) “Zero-six, you’ve been shot down, life is tough. You’re a combat aviator! Start acting like one! Remember your training, put some angles between you and your pursuers. Evade and survive and we will bring you home!”

Put some angle between you and your pursuers, included distance.  A bit of distance, far enough to not get stung by the narcissist parent and close enough to swot off honey creepers.

Narcissist fight against their wounded scapegoated care givers, baiting victim enablers  with promises of honey like cash, cars and property of all description.

Back to the beekeeper analogy; the hive can be protected from honey creepers without sticking your head in the nest. 

Studying the subject from a distance creates a rise in dopamine  Dopamine is your happy hormone.  Distance will give you serotonin the sad hormone.  Blending your state into an  intuitive and analytical zone.

Stick your bare neck in too close and the hyper vigilance hormones; adrenalin and cortisol will drive terror creating complex post traumatic stress disorder.

You control distance. https://jreidtherapy.com/

Watching adult children of narcissistic abuse or the scapegoated control distance as a work around to protect seniors from abuse has been magical.

In closing; skip narcissism!  Study the scapegoated whom despite their wounds are effective gate keepers. 

#OwenWilson #GeneHackman #Behind enemylines #scapegoat

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