Doing Business with a Narcissist in the Room

Doing business with a Narcissist in the Room

Don’t get caught taking swimming lessons.  In the movie Sleeping with the Enemy the antagonist suffered from narcissistic personality disorder comorbid with compulsive obsessive personality disorder.  The result; controlling everybody who comes into their sphere. If they find your learning something new it is not going to go well for you. 

Enmeshed

Are you enmeshing with a narcissistic family member when discussing financial planning? It’s like chatting with a 60-year-old, three-year-old.  

The narcissist has no sense of self but enormous motivation to exchange your autonomy for her beliefs and opinion.  Her false self is hollow like a know it all, unattractive like a gossip who is always wrong and financially damaging to you. 

The level of calmness required to compare the best, worst and most likely financial projections estimating reasonable and probable outcomes, is replaced with flight. fight, freeze and fawning behavior. Capitulating to cortisol spiked fear. 

Narcissistic Rage

Realizing you are not thinking exactly like the narcissist wants you to think will trigger narcissistic rage “#narcissisticrage” like a torpedo in your skull. 

Having the right to confidentiality, you can start small and in secret. Invest or insure in secret will begin your financial independence.  

I understand secrets create a narcissistic injury.  Secrets justify unpredictable narcissist anger because independent thought infuriates a narcissist.  You are a separate financial self with independent thought and the ability to plan for your financial needs. 

Plan Alone

Your financial plan cannot be a democratic family decision.  Your plan has to be right for you alone.  

When you’re adrift but can see the urban glow remember, twice a day the tide is with you.